Ending a relationship is, without a doubt, one of the worst things that someone can do, and it makes us feel miserable in general. It’s hard, and even if we have few feelings for the person, ending the relationship just makes us feel bad in general. We’re hurting someone, and it hurts.
Breaking it gently to someone, and letting them know that, yes, you’re over, is difficult… but it can be done.
Don’t Use the Same Ol’ Same Ol’
“It’s not you. It’s me.”
That’s embarrassing. And if you’ve never been told that, you’re very lucky. You shouldn’t be telling someone else that, and even if it is true, it’s a cliché that makes everyone involved feel uncomfortable.
Avoid the typical, cheesy movie lines that make you want to leave the room quickly, and tell them something that they deserve to hear. Degrading your ex partner with a line that’s been used a hundred times, and made fun of many more, will hurt her and hurt you.
Honesty is Key
You’ve heard this time and time again… but the reason that you’ve heard it is because it’s true. When you’re about to break up with someone, you need to be honest about your reasons.
Don’t love them anymore? Tell them. Cheated? Tell them. Explain why you’re breaking it off, because it’s important that they know – not only because they deserve the truth, but because it will end with a cleaner note. If she thinks that there is a chance, she might not be able to move on.
Don’t Pop it in
“Yeah, I really enjoyed the movie too… oh yeah, I love that song… oh, by the way, I don’t want to be with you anymore, any chance you could get your stuff out of my trunk?”
That’s not a good option, and that’s going to make her feel unhappy with herself, and your previous relationship. Don’t just slip it in, after you’ve been talking for a while – sit her down, tell it straight, and get it over with.
It can hurt her more if you don’t.
Think About It
Think about how you’re going to break up with your partner – and try to imagine yourself in their shoes, with how they feel your relationship is going, and how they feel about you. Being dumped can be rough – very rough – and you need to try to put yourself in their shoes.
Imagine if it was you, and she was going to be dumping you. How would you want to be handled? How would you feel?
Keep it in mind, because this is key when you need to let her down easy.
Breaking up is hard to do. Make sure you’re gentle, and caring, and let her know that you’re going to be there for her no matter what… that’s all that matters, after all.